


Visionary

by Elke Tanzer (elke_tanzer)



Category: The Man Who Fell To Earth (1976), The Man Who Fell To Earth - Tevis
Genre: Angst, Gen, Introspection, Whumping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-03-21
Updated: 2004-03-21
Packaged: 2017-10-02 17:07:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elke_tanzer/pseuds/Elke%20Tanzer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Time is not linear for Thomas Newton, and there is more to his story than simply falling... visions of pasts and futures and possibilities are difficult to untangle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Visionary

**Author's Note:**

> Hrm. How to explain this one? Visionary is set in the same... reality? universe? interpretational continuity? (yeah, that last one seems most accurate, though pretentious) of TMWFTE as Trajectory, and if you're going to read this one, you should probably read Trajectory first.
> 
> Newton's prescience is my own interpretation of the film's subtext; it has no basis in the book, and... rather limited support in the movie's subtext. I have other short stories from this continuity in progress, and they fill in some of the gaps before and after this... but I've been having some trouble with them. By polishing up this one and putting a draft of it out here, I'm hoping to shake out some of the paralysis I've had on the others.
> 
> It's difficult to write visions... it's more difficult to write visions within visions, and the resulting confusion in the character's own mind. It's like dreaming that you are having a dream about something... how do you explain it to someone who wasn't in your mind?
> 
> It's also tricky to describe how Newton reacts to visions of himself he's not seen personally but has instead been told about in the course of being convinced by the Anthean synod to go to Earth in the first place. And yes, the synod is my creation.
> 
> But of course... with any of these, they can be considered to be different paths, and he can be envisioning them out of order, either before or after they happen, or during a timeline when they will not happen or have not happened at all. The way I'm interpreting the film, some of the scenes of the movie may not have been real... in fact, most of the movie might not be real... it could all simply be one alternate path which he's thought/seen his way through, trying to find a better one. I tried to get that across with Trajectory, and I'm not sure if it worked.
> 
> Hmph.
> 
> It's tough, writing in a surreal nonlinear fandom...
> 
> Special thanks to Unovis_lj for beta reading.

He has been seen as Earth's messiah, though on his worst days, he wonders if those seeings were only false visions, the Anthean synod's hopeful dreams.

He has been seen as Anthea's prophet, as his sacrifices bring his people both the hope of continued existence as well as a cause worth living for, worth abandoning their once beautiful world. Yet, he has learned not to cling to the inspirations, the charges of the synod; their meetings are mere memories and he is another person now, worlds away and farther than they could ever have known he would be. Their assurances and encouragements, so resoundingly solid as he prepared for his journey, ring hollow now.

He has seen himself as Earth's defiler, rightfully blamed as unchecked technology burns its water away and its beauty scorches to dust, his weaknesses an unintentional betrayal of two worlds. He wishes that closing his eyes would banish the memory of those visions.

He has seen himself paraded across their television screens, torn to shreds and bleeding, a profound truth they had hoped for but never expected thus horrifyingly, brutally revealed. As the humans' view of their universe crashes down on them, one of their first instincts seems to be to crush the Other at every possible opportunity.

He has seen himself simply fail, fading along with Anthea's hopes, and leaving the humans to their own destructive ways, which seem all too similar to his own people's for all their alienness. Allowing himself to fade, allowing his commitment to the worlds to languish in his profound exhaustion, does not bring an absence of pain, and he's stopped expecting or hoping it to.

So many seeings... his mind aches with it. There are so many different ways to hurt.

So far, the most positive path he has himself seen, for most of the humans and their beautiful watery planet, is that of his acquiescence, his obscurity, his acceptance, his endurance. Along this path, they will never understand him, never accept him, and they do not understand how fragile their world really is, how fragile they themselves are. He is also fragile, but he survives being broken, again and again.

Knowing this doesn't make it much easier to bear this particular path.

Especially alone... but there is no one else. Every time he has tried to find any comfort, to find any companionship, no matter how tenuous, how gentle, or how limited a connection, it has been worse than before. He tells himself that he will not make those choices, those mistakes, again. He can overcome the loneliness... the synod foresaw it. Or so they said.

There must be other choices. Other paths. Other possibilities to try, when time allows itself to bend for him again.

He endures. He pours himself another glass of their poison, and waits for the visions to come.


End file.
